What’s the best way to deal with negative thoughts?
Negative thoughts—do I own them alone, or do we share them equally? I cannot accept sole ownership, yet I refuse to split the blame. Neither sits well with me.
Do I wonder, or do I ponder? Do I drift, or do I stay? Always I return to the same tangled thought—friends of depression. Is there any force mighty enough to break its grip?
Depression spares no one—no age, no race, no gender. Whether it bursts through the door without warning or seeps in slowly beneath life’s accumulated burdens, it lingers until the weary fade to dust.
The quick answer to this prompt seems simple: don’t accept negative thoughts, but accept their coexistence with the positive. Easy to say—far harder to live. Perhaps one settles by granting negativity a seat at the table, a co-chair with a voice—but never a vote. The real authority remains yours.
So who, then, could fill that co-chair role?
For me, there is only One—Lord Jesus Christ. He is the Way that erases negativity, and the Truth that steadies me in every storm (Matthew 11:28; John 14:27).
In my early days with Jesus, I still drifted—foolishly cuddling with dark thoughts, secretly believing that shouting my despair might summon success. But as my faith deepened, I found that Christ—the boundless power of the universe—shines into every corner of my heart. Today, negative thoughts may flicker back only when I weigh decisions, but they no longer drain me or haunt my nights.
This question also invites us to distinguish between negativity and habitual negativity. The first may nag you for a moment; the second can shadow you for a lifetime.
The saying that loneliness leads to depression is, for many, a lived truth.
Take my mentee—a quiet, gentle student who once confessed that her world appeared entirely grey. Trapped in a flat, colourless existence, she felt no excitement, no novelty. Without pressing for details, I shared what Scripture reveals: In the beginning, the earth was formless and empty; darkness was over the surface of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved—bringing light (Genesis 1:2–3).
Scripture also teaches that the darkness sin brought into the world (Romans 5:12) is overcome by the Light of Life—Jesus, the light of all humanity (John 1:5). Yet those who do not know Him remain in shadow.
Scripture untangles every knot, releases every anxiety, and restores purpose and joy. Through Scripture—and through the love of Jesus—my mentee is slowly turning from greyness towards the light of life.
As I reflect on today’s question, one truth grows ever clearer: being alone is not the same as being lonely. And befriending the depressed is far nobler than embracing depression itself.
Let my closing poem speak the rest.
—✨
“Are You Lonely”
When words don’t match, half a sentence is too much—
Yet kindred tongues are easy found,
But hearts that truly touch—how rare the ground.
A soul-friend comes by chance, not by design—
More scarce than white truffles in forest fine.
My friend, you seek a heart that mirrors yours—
Is this a beginning that no fruit assures?
Or else—the wise would rather walk alone
Than cheer a crowd from a hollow throne.
Beware the kinship of too-kindred minds—
Two equal peaks, the storm between them finds.
But if you bare your soul to the One who knows your core—
You’ll find yourself, from that day, no more.
—✨✨
en yan hua fang 